Holy Crap!! Lots have happened since I posted almost 3 years ago. Let's see, "weed" has been legalized in a few states, Patrick Swayze died, we are still at war (no matter what anyone says), Mad Men is on its final season EVER, and "50 Shades of Gray" became a movie, oh I do believe our country is going to the Shitter. My personal opinion of course, but some of the problem is people don't talk anymore. My children freak out if they have to make a PHONE CALL and TALK on the phone!!
The Kids: "Like OMG, like do I have to really talk to like, a real like, person?"
Me: "It would be good practice for you to actually speak to a real live human being."
Then I think about the statement I just said. "Good practice"? They are 15 and 17 years old...They shouldn't NEED practice!...but they DO. And that's the sad ugly truth. They are so uneducated on how the real world works, kids don't shake hands anymore, no car doors being opened for girls, what happened to looking the parents in the eyes, or don't lie to parents?!? And if a guy does open the car door for the girl she is so grateful. So much that she would sex with him that night or "just" give him a blow job. That is because he "respected" her from the very beginning of the date, but probably not at the end or next day. It is so sad how our girls' standards for boyfriends have just gone down low low low. And the boys don't even care.
Young men are getting arrested more now then ever, and in their middle school and high school years. Charges ranging from domestic battery to assault & batter to murder. I know that in my Blogs I'm always ripping on parents and children saying that they are out of control and blah, blah, blah. But this hits very close to my heart. I was a victim of abuse in high school by a boyfriend. I hid it from everyone, I was very good at hiding it and making up stories. No one had any idea, only one time was he caught. That was because he shattered my car door window and he had to pay for a new one. My mother warned me that night as she was helping pick glass pieces out of my hair. She warned, "Push will come to shove". I knew what she meant, but there was no way I was going to get out, plus I didn't think he would hurt me again. Well, I was wrong... he did. He was sent to the principle's office several times for hitting me in the hallways at school. Never once did the school call my parents, and my mom worked for the school district!...but so did his.
The abuse went on for years. I didn't tell a soul until I started dating my husband. It took me six years to tell someone about everything I went through. My husband has been by my side and never left for almost 30 years. He is an amazing man and I'm lucky. Just recently have I been able to face my fear of this old boyfriend of mine. He tried to crawl and creep his way back into my life after 25 years. All because he is getting a divorce from his second wife, whom he physically and emotionally abused. I looked up his past criminal record and it showed that his first wife had a restraining order against him too. He is not a good man, but yet women like him, is it because he held the door open for them on a date? Maybe he has a steady job and that is enough for some women, their lives are worth a paycheck. I don't know, I can't even explained why I stayed for almost 3 years with him...but I did. And if you know me I don't think in a minute you would believe that I would put up this...but I did.
My point is, people as a whole, we are not treating each other very well. It's not a man thing VS woman thing or "Mars VS Venus" thing, this is a Calm Down, Be Nice, Grow Up, Have Self Respect, & Own Your Actions thing. I think that young men are hurting young ladies because they are little boys inside. They are used to getting their own way and throw fits when they can't what they want. And who is to blame for that...That's right...The Parents!!! Girls are no angels, please don't think you're off the hook. Girls need to hold these boys to higher standards, and hold yourselves up to way higher standards. For instance, guys paying for dates, having manners, not using foul language, and greeting the parents properly EVERYTIME he picks you up is NOT a lot to ask. Just because he pays for dinner doesn't mean he gets to have his way with you for desert, that is NOT the way it works! A person that cares about someone doesn't call that person names. That is just a fact! There have been just a handful of times I have overheard a punk kid calls his girlfriend a "Bitch". Again, if you know me I don't think for one minute you would think I would let this just go by without words between the punk and I.
As parents we have a huge responsibility. But it is also a time for creativity and redemption. As parents we have an opportunity to "Out Parent" our own parents. As you were being punished don't you remember the countless times you vowed to let YOUR CHILDREN DO this or that. How about when you vowed that you WOULD NEVER let your children do chores! That is always my favorite to reflect on. Well, this is our chance to be those parents! I feel like we are letting down our children, because we are so selfish. Why not try to listen to them, think if what you are about to say is going to build them up or bring them down. Let's teach our boys to be men and our girls to be ladies. Let's vow to teach them to Calm Down, Be Nice, Grow Up, Have Self Respect, & Own Their Actions...
